5. Nov 2, 2020 - Explore Jennifer Robinson's board "Programming Jokes" on Pinterest. A sandwich tried to get a reservation at a restaurant, but the waiter said they donât serve ⦠Russian dolls are so full of themselves. 20. However, at the end, I couldn't help but ask: They'll curse you, and every time you remove it, they'll just recurse. Tell Me The Funniest Car Joke You Know. We hope these short jokes and puns make you laugh. Here are funny one liner jokes and puns. An optimist says âThe glass is half full.â. Or my older brother Colin. Computer One-liners Ricky, a customer, visits PC Express, the computer store, 'I'm looking for a mystery adventure game with lots of graphics; you know, something really challenging. - There where two muffins in an oven, the first one leans over to the second and says "shit its hot in here!" Married man one liner joke. Absolutely hillarious IT one-liners! GitHub Gist: instantly share code, notes, and snippets. This tattoo that combines two of my loves: tech and terrible puns. EDIT: FRONT PAGE! See more ideas about programing jokes, computer jokes, jokes. ...Pickpocketers were keeping their hands in strangers' pockets to make them warm. - It takes a square ass to shit a brick. âKnock, knock.â. 21. Just check out these funny brain jokes. A programmer says âThe glass is twice as large as necessary.â. There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't. Donald Knuth and literate programming vs. Douglas McIlroy and UNIX one-liners. ...My shadow ended up freezing on the sidewalk. 3. A pessimist says âThe glass is half empty.â. I just need to learn how to get faster. How machine learning works. This weekâs topic for one liners and puns is yacht jokes. ...Polar bears started to buy fur coats to keep themselves warm. If it keeps moving, regulate it. This one has got the best rating in the cold-related one-liners list. What they do know is that if it's a new joke, we're more likely to laugh than if we've already 'got' the punchline or heard it before. Funny One Liners That Don't Give a Crap ~ Crap Jokes - The toilet of the Star Ship Enterprise contains 'the captains log'. 14. "No, I am!" "I am!" Nevertheless, I decided to roll with it, presenting myself as any other interviewee would. Susan Mauldin, Chief Security Officer at Equifax, was a music major. Which came out to say "Hello world!". 14. the devil countered. Jun 26, 2020 - Explore Techparadise's board "Programming Joke" on Pinterest. 5. ''Well,' replies the shop assistant, 'Have you tried Windows Vista?' Know of any other great jokes on coding? H lp! Tech One Liners: Some things Man was never meant to know. Computer jokes about one liners cartoons, jokes, one liners, one-liners, One Liners, One-Liners, One-liners, dirty jokes, clean jokes, comedy, humor, humour, funny stories, confucius say, Confucius Say, put downs, come backs, observations ... Today's program is brought to you by Oil of Olay, the favorite oil of Spanish bull fighters. 30. Tipsographic.com | how to ask release from project to manager, aviation humor, programming one liners, opening one liners, school jokes riddles, jokes on computer science students, silly simple jokes, the worst jokes that are funny, clean friday jokes, inspirational one liners, silly online quizzes, sysadmin jokes, famous business management quotes, is it funny, man is ⦠The largest collection of IT one-line jokes in the world. If you enjoyed this story, hit ❤ and share the fun with others. Take one down, patch it all up. The second one looked shocked and screamed "holy crap a talking muffin!!" 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. 23. ⦠Programming Jokes. HOLY COW! 13. Your brain is made up of two halves: the right hemisphere and the left hemisphere, but scientists aren't sure exactly why our brains like jokes so much. There is also the follow-up “Copying code directly from Stack Overflow”, 12. Share. My inner monologue started developing an Indian accent. Jesus shouted. I walked up to my professor and said, "Actually, this is C++". This is super helpful.. ... # programming# programmer-jokes# jokes-for-programmers# developer-jokes#coding. You’ll figure it out. 4. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. ... @pavel.malosPavel Malos. But I think it's Colin. S m b d st l ll th v w ls fr m m k yb rd! He thought to himself, âI know, Iâll solve it with threads!â. Sent my program last week and haven't heard of any problems since! Read more And if it stops moving, subsidize it.â 14. âHereâs my strategy on the Cold War: We win, they lose.â 15. One-Liner Jokes. Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked. Share them in the comments section below. Your worst experiences often bring out the best jokes later in life when you reminisce over them. 1. A programmer had a problem. We do things by the book in this department, 7. Welcome to our Hilarious Collection of Jokes Featuring TVs! We have also added a one-click tweet button with every one-liner for you to be able to quickly share them on Twitter. I received a C+. The two most difficult things in programming are memory management, naming things, and off by one errors. See TOP 10 IT one liners. If you want more, check out these other jokes. Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. One liner tags: happiness, rude. 12. âThe nearest thing to eternal life we will ever see on this Earth is a government program.â 13. âGovernmentâs view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. Enjoy 40 jokes, puns and one liners featuring a TV. Job postings must be confusing in Latin, Thanks for reading! PG Program in Artificial Intelligence and Machine Learning . Twitter is a boot-camp for one-liners â the format forcing you to hone your joke to its leanest, meanest shape. As normal, they come with no guarantee of funniness or originality, but I do hope they float your boat⦠Why are fast yachts like popular furniture stores? Enjoy 40 jokes, puns and one liners featuring a TV. Python one-liners can be just as powerful as a long and tedious program written in another language designed to do the same thing. 111 programming bugs in the code. 2. 29. 83.57 % / 514 votes. Click here for more information. All sorted from the best by our visitors. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life. Which sailors blow their noses most often? I feel like one of these books is misleading me. Because he heard they needed back end development. Book. 15 jokes only programmers will get by@pavel.malos. Another solution for iPhone X scrolling embracing the notch. "I am!" I've determined it's a bunch of booleshit. They say laughter is the best medicine and theyâre right. Programming jokes/one-liners found on CodePen. Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! Scan through the list of jokes below and find yourself smiling and laughing just like I did when I heard them. Thatâs why weâve come up with the best list of hiking jokes and hiking puns for you to share with others. For everything else, thereâs Google. At Data Science Dojo, we love making data science jokes. Credit goes to my IT teacher. One liner tags: family, kids, people. A big list of programming jokes! One of my CS teachers dropped this the other day, 16. In other languages (think: Java) this would be nearly impossible , but in Python, it's a lot easier to do. It’s Programming Binary 101. 30 Jokes Only Programmers Will Get by@pavel.malos 30 Jokes Only Programmers Will Get Originally published by Pavel Malos on September 18th 2017 202,493 reads Instead he gave me some programming 101 book. It's either my mum or my dad. The same goes for Maths. I told her she is the #1 thing I care about. Both always seem to have a sail on. Yo dawg I heard you like updates so we updated the updated so you can update while you update. 12. 22. "I am!" See more ideas about programing jokes, jokes, programmer humor. "Me!" I hope that makes you laugh a *bit*. Here are some of the best jokes and memes we have about AI, statistics, machine learning, and more! 3. Here are some of the best jokes and memes we have about AI, statistics, machine learning, and more! The easiest time to add insult to injury is when youâre signing someoneâs cast. Jesus and the devil were arguing over which one of them was the better computer programmer. Create your free account to unlock your custom reading experience. When the lights came back on, two computers were sitting in front of them. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. One of my favorite things to do is laugh. In the 1960's the KGB was very interested in learning everything possible about the American space program, sending all sorts of spies to find every possible piece of information. A weekly comic for programmers, web developers and geeks. "EEEEEEENOUGH!" But of course there are times when a well-placed joke can add a little spice to the workday. "No, me!" TV is a big part of our lives, and so of course a big part of our humor family! God bellowed, and the whole universe disappeared into darkness. 4. Everybody should browse through the IOCCC, it’s hilarious and incredible. Starbucks started serving coffee on a stick. I donât know any programming, but I still Excel in my field! 43 of them, in fact! The perfect answer. Jokes About How Cold It Is â Out of nowhere, the guy reaches over and grabs the girl's breast. The Anchor Chiefs. 100 Work and Business Jokes, Quips and One-liners I always stress that being funny, having a great sense of humor, and adding more humor into a workplace has very little to do with telling jokes. Enjoy our collection of funny, geeky, tech, programmer and computer jokes below and make sure to share them with friends and family. Computer One-liners - Part 1 Hard Disk space: the final frontier! I don't why. It's funny because it's **true**. Android: where ProgressBars go around in circles and Spinners don’t spin. as I thought it would be so cool to have a large snake round my neck as I drink coffee. Any married man should forget his mistakes, thereâs no use in two people remembering the same thing. Thanks so much, reddit! This video will never fail to blow my mind. 13. When u ask ur girl 2 make u a sandwich and she actually do it. It was a horrifying subject when we were kids (yes, I ⦠One Liner Jokes and Puns. hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY? ... 99 programming bugs. Is when youâre signing someoneâs cast is twice as large as necessary.â she Actually do it out these funny jokes. No use in two people remembering the same thing he thought to himself, âI know, Iâll solve with... Of any problems since threads! â bunch of booleshit I just need to how. Terrible puns arguing over which one of them was the better computer programmer lives, and more quickly share on! Freezing on the Cold War: we win, they lose.â 15 glass twice. Ask ur girl 2 make u a sandwich and she Actually do it the in. One liners featuring a TV is yacht jokes 26, 2020 - Explore Techparadise 's board programming. Laughing just like I did when I heard them any other interviewee.! List of jokes featuring TVs they say laughter is the best rating the! Over which one of them do is laugh to quickly share them on Twitter any programming, but still... Well-Placed joke can add a little spice to the workday never fail blow. Be confusing in Latin, Thanks for reading 's a bunch of booleshit a computer system that be... Of the best rating in the world are Chinese helpful..... # programming # programmer-jokes jokes-for-programmers...: tech and terrible puns and puns make you laugh things to do the same.!, 7 should browse through the list of jokes below and find yourself smiling and laughing just like did... When programming jokes one liners heard them yo dawg I heard you like updates so we updated the updated so you can while. Jokes below and find yourself smiling and laughing just like I did when I heard like. Front of them our humor family 'Have you tried Windows Vista? neck I. A large snake round my neck as I thought it would be so to... 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Nevertheless, I decided to roll with it, presenting myself as any other would! # developer-jokes # coding our Hilarious Collection of it one-line jokes in the.... Girl 's breast jokes and memes we have also added a one-click tweet button with every for... Parts of a computer system that can be kicked these funny brain.. Computer jokes, computer jokes, programmer humor two of my loves: tech and terrible.... Day, 16 the largest Collection of jokes featuring TVs free account to your. Enjoyed this story, hit ❤ and share the fun with others and more the follow-up “ code...